I had a pretty strong idea of the traits of the various aliens. I knew the Cara’ot were master traders, and genetic engineers. I knew the Isanjo were functionally high steel workers, the Flutes are highly skilled in mathematics. Truthfully I cheated a bit though I’m going to have to address this in book four since I have an alien view point character. Because the aliens are a conquered people their own religions, cultural norms, etc. have been suppressed by their human rulers. Most of them claim to worship human gods, particularly the Christian god, they don’t have to accept the limits female participation in business because they are considered less than, but in most ways they try to ape their conquerors. It’s just safer that way.
How does one learn to live life? Is it in the way we were raised? Is it the choices we make? Is it how we perceive things? She was not raised like this. No one would make choices to feel like this and perception is reality, no? If her scars were on the outside instead of on the inside, she would be immediately raced to a hospital. The room would fill with doctors and nurses scurrying to make her lively. But the scars remained on the inside so the world did not see the wounds. The pain remained unseen and the rush for help was nowhere to be found.
You should try to use more detail. Your sentence has the potential to be chilling or make the reader grit their teeth. You could make the reader shudder or feel sick or fearful. If you just made it less basic, you could have a masterpiece sentence. Sure you attract attention, but it feels too simple. You could have the power to make an awesome sentence that pulls the reader in but makes them want to cringe and turn away. I can’t say much because I don’t even know what you’re going for or what almost sliced his finger off. I just think that, with additional information, this could be a stellar sentence. (Excuse the word choice, please. I’m exhausted, and that’s just what came to mind.) You’re on a good track with your idea though. Thank you. You actually inspired me to make a sentence I really love.